Stay Curious.
Dig Deeper.
Nurture What Matters.
Be BoldHeart.
Enjoy Your Life.

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The BoldHeartMama desires to enjoy living out the choices that she’s made for herself and for her family. She is a relentless learner: curious, inquisitive, and open to the possibilities of her life and of the human condition. She understands that there isn't one right way—she asks questions that dig deeper to make sense of it all and to find her own path.

She pays attention to and nurtures whatever it is she really cares about, letting go of the rest (for now) knowing she can't do and be everything all at once. She embraces her imperfections in favor of "good enough"—her imperfect self, her imperfect home, her imperfect mothering, her imperfect desires—and she never stops evolving as a woman and mother. She is a BoldHeart, authentic and true to herself.

The BoldHeartMama knows there is only this one life and she's all in. She is present and engaged and making things happen. Her intuition is her guide. She seeks to be inspired and relies on her creativity and her resourcefulness to solve the big and little challenges that she and her family face together as they navigate their relationships and their world.

The BoldHeartMama is willing to take calculated risks to make her biggest dreams come true. She is living out her BoldHeart in the moment, making small moves and taking little steps that add up, and she's cultivating a good life for herself and her family in the process. Read More!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Hallelujah

Finally, some breastfeeding advice that actually makes sense!

I guess I'm a visual learner, because for us this did the trick.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Bummer

For a long time (5 weeks) I've been complaining about how I want to get back to the gym, and how I've been held prisoner by the "breastfeeding/pumping/bottle feeding/nipple confusion" dilemma.

It's been almost six weeks since Roscoe was born. Six is also the number of weeks we were told to wait before introducing a bottle. Despite the frustrating fact that Roscoe and I really have not perfected the art of breastfeeding, I've become more comfortable with the idea of introducing a bottle.

Our pediatrician recommended that we practice bottle feeding with Roscoe beforehand, in case he did not immediately take to it. I assumed that we would work on bottle feeding this week, and by NEXT week we would all be feeling confident enough for me to re-enter the fit club.

Plus, with Roscoe currently going through another growth spurt, and nursing every hour or so for the last 28 hours, I figured now would be as good a time to start as any.

Andy crossed the street to retrieve my frozen stash of breast milk from our neighbor's freezer (why they had the milk is a story for a different day), and I quickly set about defrosting the baggies in a bowl of running water. Sadly, I hadn't pumped nearly as much as I remembered, and had to use 6 of the 8 baggies I had stored in order to constitute a meager 4 ounces. Given, my initial efforts at pumping in the early weeks did not amount to very much milk, and I haven't really been motivated to pump since then.

After I filled the bottle (a brand that claims to mimic breastfeeding by requiring the baby to first compress the inner chamber, and then suck the nipple to release the milk), I heated a pot of water and diligently swirled the bottle around for several minutes until the milk was nice and warm.

Earlier in the day we had reread an article dedicated to "bottle feeding the breastfed baby" so we were feeling prepared, and excited to get started.

No sooner had Andy touched the nipple to Roscoe's lips, than Roscoe went to town. He quickly sucked down the first ounce which had us worried because we were aiming to spread the feeding out over 20 minutes or more. Andy initiated breaks every so often to burp Roscoe and engage him in conversation, but Roscoe was pretty short tempered, with only one thing on his mind.

Once it was clear that good progress was being made, I sat down on the other side of the room to pump and simultaneously eat my dinner. I could hear Roscoe's satisfied gulps, and little sighs, and could see his fists balled up tight under his chin.



As Roscoe enjoyed his first bottled meal, I was feeling really good about the whole thing. I imagined hopping out the back door, my tennies firmly on the road, and run, run, running .... back at home Andy would prepare a bottle, feed our little Roscoe 'till his belly was full, and I would return home 400 calories lighter to the treat of a sleeping baby.

Just as I was getting giddy I heard a little gurgle. Two seconds later Andy yelled out "Roscoe just projectile vomited all his milk!"

No. Way.

But it was true. In one steady stream, he'd literally evacuated the entire contents of his belly, and the evidence was all over Poppa and poor Baby Roscoe.

At the realization I suddenly felt quite depressed. Seriously. I wanted to cry.

The good news is that Roscoe took to the bottle like a baby leach. The bad news is that my frozen milk supply is practically gone, and now that we've established our desire to bottle feed him once a day, I have to figure out how to logistically breastfeed a baby every couple hours AND pump enough milk to escape the house 5 times a week.

We also learned a few good lessons:
1. Stretch the feeding session even more in order to allow his body to accurately register when he's full
2. Burp often and long enough to get out all the bubbles
3. No bouncing, or playing immediately after a feeding

And, as a final note, I will remind myself that even though this was not a perfect first run, I am that much closer to gaining a little freedom! This could mean a trip to the gym, a run around the neighborhood, date night, a movie, or even just a break during one of Roscoe's feeding frenzies.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Lazy Days

Grandma Stacy recently bought for Roscoe a kiddie pool and a full coverage swimsuit set (with SPF 50), size 3-6 months. Roscoe has yet to reach 8 pounds and still fits very comfortably in newborn clothing, so when I suited him up for his first summertime splashdown, he was swimming in his rash guard and trunks. The sun was too bright and the water too cold, but for the most part, he tolerated the experience.






Thanks Grandma! We're going to try again soon!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Say Cheese!

Our Pediatrician said we could expect Roscoe to master smiling between weeks 4 and 6.

Every day this week, I tried my very hardest to coax a smile out of him, and this evening, as we were getting ready to head out for dinner, Roscoe gave us two huge gummy grins!

Yay--what a reward for all the work of the past 5 weeks!

I will try to capture one on camera to post!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Happy Dad's Day


To kick off his first Father's Day, Roscoe and I baked for Poppa a heaping plate of banana-chocolate-chip pancakes, and a recipe for homemade cheese danishes. He also received a super cool tattoo tee!

We all shared the luxury of sleeping in, and in the late afternoon we listened to the Father's Day edition of NPR's "Driveway Moments"*. My parents invited us for a special dinner to celebrate both my dad and my mom (this year Father's Day fell on her birthday!), and afterward we took a long walk (to burn off those Tiramisu cupcakes!).

Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's, especially my baby's, my own, and Andy's (who we celebrated over breakfast on Saturday)!

*What is a Driveway Moment?
You're driving along, listening to a story on NPR. Suddenly, you find yourself at your destination, so riveted to a piece that you sit in your idling car to hear it all the way through.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Roscoe is one month old!

A lot has changed for us in the past 31 days! Not only did we welcome into our lives a sweet and handsome little boy, but he grew by an inch and now weighs 7 lbs 5 oz.


These days, our "routine" is loosely based on sleep/wake cycles of 1.5 to 3 hours during the day, and 2 to 4 hours at night--if we're lucky, we have to wake up only once. Roscoe likes to eat immediately (and I stress IMMEDIATELY) after he wakes, and then nurses for at least 30 to 60 minutes. During the day, after he's nice and full, he stays alert for 20 to 40 minutes before heading back to dreamland.

Roscoe's personality is beginning to emerge; we may have a type A on our hands--is the house big enough for two?! He's becoming more interactive, and his interest in all the baby gadgets and gizmos that we've accumulated is growing. He's also a super cuddly little dude, which I love. Things are starting to get fun! And we're anticipating a toothless, dimply, smile soon!

Andy has been back at work full time for almost a week now, and we miss him a lot! But we had a nice transition since he stayed home for one week and worked part time for an additional two.

Roscoe and I usually get our day started around 11:00. Roscoe loves the sling, and takes a nice long nap in it during our daily walk. We also try to enjoy at least one planned outing each day. In my "free time" I've resumed my cooking hobby, and have been experimenting with ice cream recipes and other not so healthy treats.

So far, Roscoe has blue eyes, and both Andy's hair color and skin tone. Who would have guessed!?

Happy first month Baby Roscoe! Momma and Poppa can't imagine a life without YOU!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Tres Amigos!

Brian and Courtney (Andy's sister) found out today that they are expecting another little BOY!


In November, our nephew Mack will have a new little brother, and Roscoe will have another cousin! Yay, 3 little boy cousins--so cute!

Congratulations C & B!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Sunday, June 14, 2009

25 down!

In an effort to jump start my pregnancy weight loss, I joined Weight Watchers 6 days postpartum. Halfway through the first week, it was clear that the pounds were going to come off regardless of how closely I stuck to my points allowance. So, while I kept track of my intake, I modified neither the type of food that I ate, nor the quantity.

After 3.5 weeks of free-for-all eating, I think I'm ready to get serious.

Part of me doubts my ability to truly focus on the nutrition piece until I'm back in a routine at the gym. For me, the two have always gone hand in hand. At earliest, I'm probably looking at next week since my ability to leave the house to work out is contingent on my and Roscoe's ability to master breastfeeding in order to introduce a bottle without compromising his latch. There is such a thing as "nipple confusion", and I want to avoid it! This is tricky stuff!

My fingers are crossed that we'll be well situated in the next week or two.

So, in the name of accountability, I'm posting that I have 15 pounds left to lose, and that tomorrow is start day!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Splish Splash!

One of my favorite (and most anticipated) baby purchases was the baby Wash Pod. The Wash Pod is different from other baby bathtubs in that it resembles a small trashcan, and submerges the little one up to their neck in water, offering a "womb-like environment".
We were drawn to this product with visions of screaming goose-bumped babies at bath time, and liked the idea of making it more enjoyable.

Before today, Roscoe and I have just taken our baths together, which he LOVES! As soon as I bring him into the water, he completely relaxes, and practically falls asleep!

But, Andy and I were excited to try out the new tub as part of our routine for tonight. So we brought out the Wash Pod, filled it up, and plopped Roscoe in.

He really loved it, at first.

We had some issues with the water level and realized we needed to pour some of it out. So out came Roscoe who had to wait while the water was readjusted, which he didn't like at all. Once we put him back in, he gulped up some water and had a coughing fit, so I had to pull him back out again. Then we washed his hair, but by the end of it he was screaming so much we felt like we were torturing him, so we called it quits.

We have decided to stick with bath sharing for now, and will bring out the Wash Pod when Roscoe is just a little bigger (and has better head control).

A picture taken before the bath time melt down occurred:

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Happy 27th!


This year in celebration of Andy's birthday, we opted for low-key with an early dinner at a local hot spot. It took us an hour and a half to get out of the house, but we made it before the dinner hour, and despite the customary Happy Birthday song--sung with exuberance and emphasized with vigorous clapping (which elicited only a few stirs from Roscoe)--we enjoyed a sleeping baby, and a dinner out on the town (new-parent style).

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

9,861 days and many more!

As I sit in the car on the eve of my 27th birthday (Wow, I thought I was turning 26 until I typed that!) waiting for Jacqueline and R to return from a much anticipated La Leche League meeting, I am feeling nostalgic and thankful for life as I currently know it.

I have an amazing wife, a happy little son, and a lot of extras that so many others are not as fortunate to enjoy right now. So much has changed in the 10 years Jacqueline and I have been together, and yet the really important stuff remains the same.

Jacqueline is still the beautiful, bouncy-haired, California girl I met in high school—incredibly strong, independent, and free spirited.

We're still having so much fun, living the life we (more or less) dreamed and worked together to create.

And now, to top it all off, we have Roscoe, who brings with him a different set of challenges to navigate, but mostly happiness and joy, and a new appreciation for the fact that life will never again be what it was before he arrived.

I'm looking forward to the coming year and all that we get to experience as a new family of three.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

2 weeks and counting...

Topics discussed at my two week postpartum visit:

How to tell the difference between "normal" baby poop and diarrhea
(FYI, one's more watery)

Infant hearing screenings--I still need to schedule this.

Postpartum weight loss: Susan says I probably won't lose any more weight without some effort on my part. Boo!

Exercise: not recommended until 6 weeks. Double boo!

Bottle feeding expressed milk: not recommended until 6 weeks. ugh....

That is all.

Friday, June 5, 2009

TGIF!

Friday night has been reduced to a trip to Toys R US in order for me to "get out of the house".

Once there we perused children's books, newborn onesies, and a selection of games with the hope of finding some adult entertainment.

We triumphantly returned home with SCRABBLE SLAM! and Yahtzee Free for All, and played both while baking and eating M&M cookies acquired through a fundraiser.

Our little star!

Roscoe was again the center of attention on Monday when Mel came for his 2 week photo shoot.

Despite the use of a space heater, poor Baby Roscoe was not happy with mom and dad who wanted to pose him naked and in a variety of outfits. He fussed a majority of the time, and (like mom) required lots of "snacks" in between shots.

Despite the challenges, we're sure Mel captured something great!
Stay tuned! The pics should be in next week!!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Yipee!

With the help of this I pumped 3 whole ounces of liquid gold. Who knew something so ugly could be so useful!

While pumping "hands free" I enjoyed a bagel, a banana, a nectarine, and a magazine. Prior to pumping, I even managed to take a shower--all this and it's only 7:00 am!

Today is going to be a good day!

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

No small feat

Roscoe and I experienced our first successful (solo) outing today!

After a morning of preparation that included two diaper changes, two feedings, one change of clothes and a half-nap interrupted by another feeding, I managed to safely transport a sleeping Roscoe to the mall (of all places) where I met up with Katie and Heidi for a suburban mom power walk...

We also got to try out the stroller for the first time. With only one desperate phone call to Dad, I figured out how to open the stroller and attach the car seat adapter.

Roscoe was a gem and slept for the duration of the walk, in fact, he remained asleep long enough for me to stop in at Wegman's to grab a few items. Ahhh....right now, the small things in life are highly rewarding. I've been feeling very cooped up and unproductive the past two weeks :(

But, today was a good day in that I had a reason to get dressed and out of the house, and we proved that with a little planning it is indeed possible to venture out of the neighborhood for a little fun.

In the near future I hope to
1. Get my butt back to the gym
2. Start pumping so I can earn some time that won't be spent attached to my son
3. Enjoy a date night with Andy--I'd love a restaurant meal and a rated R movie
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